This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 53; the fifty-third edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. In association with Soulmates: Love without ownership by Vinit K Bansal. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.
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Her
memories of her father were of him being mostly away. She remembered how her
father always made the excuse of being tired whenever she asked him to play
with her. Her father gave her everything except his time. She remembers how her
father always brought her chocolates. She hated her father and she hated
chocolates.
For
everyone else around her “growing up was a trap”, but for her “growing up was a
relief”- relief that she doesn't have to see her father again. The fact that
her every friend adored their father made her angrier. They would tell stories
of their happy memories with their father and that would make her realize what
she missed or she never had.
On her
every birthday she would find a box of chocolates lying on the doorstep, each
one different and expensive than before. She knew who keep them there year
after year, her father. Without even a
second thought she always threw them away mumbling something about her father
trying to lure her with expensive gifts. What she never noticed was that those
expensive gifts were only chocolates.
One day her
mother called her. She was only too happy to talk to her. Her mother was the
only person she was close to. She loved her deeply.
“Hello
mom.”
“Kate,
how are you.”
“I am
fine mom, but you sound distressed. Is everything alright?”
“No
Kate. That’s what I have called you for.”
“What
happened mom?”
Now even
she was worried. The mere thought that something might have happened to her mom
scared her to the soul.
“Kate,
your father is suffering from cancer. He might not make it for long.”
She was
stunned. She had never thought something like this might happen. But after a
fraction of second she thought that it must be his father’s ploy to get her
talk to him again. He had been trying for so long but nothing worked, so maybe
he worked this out. She was in fact sure that this is the case. She was even
angrier with her father for being so thoughtless about her mother. She was
shaken thinking how her mother have been feeling now. She kept the thoughts to
herself and didn't mouth it to her mother.
“Kate,
you are there?”
“Yes
mom. I am sorry to hear that.”
“I want
you to talk to your father at least once. I want you to forgive him baby.”
“I will
call him when I have time.”
“Thank
you darling. I love you so much.”
“I love
you too mom.”
She never
called her father.
Days
passed, weeks turned in to months. Her mother called her again, begging her to
see her father one last time. She couldn't say no. She reached the hospital where her father was
admitted. She was shocked on what she saw. She had always remembered her father
tall, strong and handsome. The man on
the bed was way to smaller and weaker. His face was wrinkled and his eyes were
sunken. It was the way her mother was caring for the man that made her sure he
was her father. His eyes gleamed when he saw her standing at the door. She felt
guilty. She saw her father whispering something to her mother’s ear and then
everyone left the room. She was alone with the man she hadn't seen and talked
with for over a decade, the man she forgot was her father. He signaled her to
come near. She obliged.
“Kate”, he whispered, “I was hoping you would
come. I have so much to say to you.” She saw his eyes were wet. “You know the
day you were born I was the happiest man in the world. When I held you for the
first time in my arms I was born again, as a father. I still remember that
beautiful tiny face of yours. You looked at me with those shiny happy eyes and
I knew that’s how I want to see your eyes- always gleaming with happiness. I
gave you my every second I could. Whenever I was at home I let your mother have
you only when you were to be fed. I always held you in my arms. I used to get
thrilled each time you wrapped your tiny palm around my finger. We had nothing
much but we felt like king and queen because we had you. You have always been
my princess.”
He looked
at her with those sunken teary eyes and something inside her shook. “It was your third birthday. As usual we
got you everything we could. We took you out and your eyes fell on a box of
chocolate in the hands of one of your friends. You wanted it. We had no means
to get you that box of chocolate or any other chocolate. They came pretty
expensive then and I had a limited salary. You cried very hard. You kept crying
all day and it killed me. I was ashamed of myself that I could not fulfill your
one simple desire. I wondered how I was going to fulfill your other dreams and
the dreams we had for you. Until that day I was content with my job and whatever
I earned. You mother never complained and she ran the household efficiently
with whatever I gave her. But that one box of chocolate made me realize it was
not enough. I had to work hard, and I did. "
Tears ran
down her eyes, regret tore her soul apart. “Kate, I loved you then and I
love you now. You are a part of me. I did not play with you, yes, but that
doesn’t mean I never gave you my time. Before everything I did, every step I
took there was only one thing I thought of, YOU. While you slept I sat beside
you watching you dream. You would smile sometimes and I would wonder what are
you dreaming of. You were always in my heart and on my mind before anything
else. It’s just that I never got to tell
you. You are a part of my soul; I thought you would understand once you grow
up. But we just grew apart. I am glad you came, else I would have died without
letting you know how much I have loved you.”
She cried,
hugged her father tight burying her face on his chest. She felt light now that
all her hatred was washed away with her father’s love. She felt her father’s
arm taking her in and she snuggled close wanting to feel the warmth she had
missed in all these years. She felt her father’s arm slugging and slipping
away. Her heart stopped. He died. She looked at his quite demeanor. Her life flashed in front of her eyes. She
cried hard. In one moment she found her father and lost him too.
The fellow Blog-a-Tonics who took part in this Blog-a-Ton and links to their respective posts can be checked here. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton. Participation Count: 17
